There comes a time in every entrepreneur’s life when she has done EVERYTHING possible to make something work and it’s not happening. Take my fiber artist client for example. She is having her graphic look re-designed, and it is in the hands of the branding expert with the deadline pushed off until late January. Her marketing pro has all the contact information needed for the big cyber push coming up at the end of the month. There’s nothing more to attend to there. A table that needs its final coat of paint for her display is being held up by the designated artisan who is suffering from a bad back. Getting the picture? Hasn’t this happened to you?
What to do?
I asked her what else was on her list? She mentioned that she’d really like to complete her home renovation that has a couple of items still not addressed, like the tiles for the kitchen and bathroom floor, plus some new fixtures to purchase.
My coaching fieldwork assignment for her: Go buy a toilet.
My friend Betsy the professional organizer insists, and I agree, that miracles happen when you get busy and productive in another arena of your life. Her mantra is, “Clean a closet, find a boyfriend” a miracle she has experienced and witnessed time after time.
The principle behind this is allowing the Universe to do its share. When you know in your heart that you have crossed every t and dotted every i, then it’s time to let go. Stop stirring the pot. Just allow. This is hard work for doers.
If you were God and saw two people working really hard at the same task and one of them tried to do it all herself and the other said, “I’ve done all I can do. I need some help here,” who would you choose to give a hand to?



17 comments
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January 19, 2010 at 1:17 am
Miriam Salpeter, Keppie Careers
I have been meaning to click through to this post. (I don’t need a boyfriend, but I was curious!) I’m so glad I did. What a great message and one that hits home for me. Thanks for the reminder to not put all of my energies in one place!
I hope you are off to a wonderful new year!
January 19, 2010 at 8:31 am
janepollak
@Miriam
I’m with you! Whatever it is we’re trying to manifest happens most often when we stop TRYING so hard to manifest it. Glad you took a peek and identified. Thanks for your comment.
January 21, 2010 at 9:10 am
Katie Atkinson
I couldn’t agree more! For those of us that are self employed work rarely comes in an even steady stream. I am learning to embrace the open days more and am making a point to continually expand my contacts and links to all kinds of other organizations. One example- donating a drawing to the Rhema Hort Mann Foundation in NYC. The money raised in their auction tonight “Buy what you love” will benefit cancer patients. My web site is listed on the back of my peice and it is exciting to imagine what might come out of it, and that it will benfit someone in need.
January 21, 2010 at 9:38 am
Dave K
It is so true that God does for us sometimes what we cannot do for ourselves. I’m Betsy’s husband and have witnessed this in letting go in my own life. When I let go of trying to get “dates”, the best date found me and we have been happily together ever since. Last week there was an article about my video business in the Westport News. I sent out announcements about it and posted it in several locations. After a few days of no new business (yet) as a result of the article, I realized I had done all I knew to do with it and was grateful for the exposure, hoping the article would inspire someone in a similar “career” position…and let it go and went about editing a wedding recently videotaped. That very same afternoon I was informed that I had been awarded a 2010 Bride’s choice award for wedding videography. I’ve sent that announcement around, posted it and am now letting that go as I edit a piece on a child’s first year of life. Am excited to see what comes next!
January 21, 2010 at 10:21 am
janepollak
@Katie
I love your attitude! Imagining who might see your work and respond is part of the joy of letting go. Thanks for your thoughts.
@Dave
Thank you for these examples and the testimonial to Betsy. Letting go of trying to get dates may be the very best thing that ever happened to you!
January 21, 2010 at 11:41 am
Clarissa
This is exactly how I started my business 10 years ago! I had an entire year “off” dealing with a serious illness. When I could see that it was time to get back to work I had to figure out exactly what that work would be. I had to start from scratch. I sent resumes out to every company I had ever been interested in working for. I applied for jobs that I had no experience in, but intrigued me. I went through my list of “what I want to do when I grow up” and really made an effort to get in there-wherever that was. Then I sat back and waited. The flood of calls for the work I currently do was overwhelming! It was undeniable- I create reproduction soft furnishings for historic interiors, and that’s what I am supposed to be doing. In the end, the only choice I really made was to make every effort to connect with anything I ever wanted to try professionally. Once that was done, the decision was made for me.
January 21, 2010 at 2:08 pm
@LenaWest
Whoo whee, Jane. This was a humdinger of a post! Due to a bunch of “not happenings” in my business and personal life recently, I’ve had to learn this lesson and learn it well.
I’m someone who likes to plan and get things done, and there are times where that just doesn’t work with Divine Timing.
When this happens in my life, I simply say: “It is what it is,” and I release it for the highest good of everyone involved.
Having that simple mantra serves as a physical, mental and audible cue to shift my energy and stop “white knuckling” my way through life’s events. It hasn’t failed me yet so that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
January 21, 2010 at 2:52 pm
Jennifer
I loved this post! For months I’ve been saying – I don’t know what else I can do to promote my business and move it to the next level. Then I just decided to forget about it and let it take its course. It’s a tough thing to do, but I know in the end it will pay off.
January 21, 2010 at 4:14 pm
Wendy Wrzos
I totally agree with this, Jane. I had to make my first presentation yesterday and I didn’t realize how long it had taken me to prepare and that the aftermath would be a night of second guessing my talk – what I should have/could have done. My head was overwhelmed but I seemed stuck in self-doubt, even though I knew I had done well.
This morning I knew I had to decompress and I just got my stack of christmas cards and started to write Thank-yous. I made a conscious effort to take a break from work.
A few hours later and I am back at work, totally refreshed and knowing what I need to do.
It takes practice to follow the universe (and our hearts) but the payoff is a calmer and smoother way to live.
wendy
January 22, 2010 at 8:52 am
eileen
So true! Reminds me of the poem I have taped to my monitor:
As children bring their broken toys with tears for us to mend
I brought my broken dreams to God because he was my friend
But then instead of leaving him in peace to work alone
I hung around and tried to help in ways that were my own
At last I snatched them back and cried, “How could you be so SLOW?”
He said, “My child, what could I do, you never did LET GO.”
Great advice, Jane. But, buying toilets every time could get expensive!
January 22, 2010 at 10:27 am
janepollak
@Clarissa
I love hearing how you approached your re-entry. I’m very excited to meet you at the Eileen Fisher event next week.
@Lena
How did I know you’d relate! Nicely said. Thanks for your comment.
@Wendy
What a great example! Thanks so much.
@Eileen
That gave me goosebumps. Thanks for sharing it.
January 22, 2010 at 2:57 pm
Reina S. Weiner
Letting go? Not easy for most of us and most definitely includes me. Finally let my book (Strong From the Start – Raising Confident and Resilient Kids) go, out of my hands and into the loving computer of my layout/cover lady. Interestingly, it may have been easier to let my children go than the book about them! What works for me is reminding myself that perfection obstructs goals. Good is good enough.
January 24, 2010 at 3:43 pm
janepollak
@Reina
Thanks for contributing your wisdom and letting us know where to find more. I agree that good is good enough.
January 29, 2010 at 4:09 pm
Nancy Ottino
Great advice! For one year have been trying to reinvent my husbands life after a job layoff. Nothing worked. I finally let go and he made some good decisions. One is to sell all 3 of our houses and travel the world for 6 months to a year. I love that idea. We have both been homeowners and extremely responsible since our early twenties. It is time to let go and have some fun! I will let you know what happens next. Thanks
February 1, 2010 at 10:28 am
janepollak
@Nancy
I love this! Letting go is the miracle cure, eh?! I agree that it’s time for you and your husband to travel and have fun. Great choice! Thanks for letting me know.
February 10, 2010 at 7:55 pm
Michele Milton
This is so true. As of the New Year and moving my Real Estate License to a new company- many new and positive doors have opened and shown me a new & exciting path to follow- Also letting go of what is not working and making room for what is supposed to be a part of my life- Really incredible- Thanks-
February 12, 2010 at 12:59 pm
Reina S. Weiner
Cleaning up physically helps us to clean up mentally. Amazing how all our “parts” are connected! Best to you in your new company. Change is good.