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The Class of 1970 is gathering today, along with hundreds of other alumnae from Mount Holyoke College to celebrate our 40th reunion since graduation. I’m imagining that the topic of conversation among us baby boomers will have to include the enormous changes we’ve encountered since we first set foot on the South Hadley campus in the mid-60′s.
Then there were curfews with locked dormitory building doors, no locks on our dorm room doors, no phones in the rooms, no computers, dress-up meals (skirts for dinner nightly; Gracious Living with stockings and pumps on Wednesday nights and Sunday lunch) and men only allowed in the parlor rooms on the first floor.
During the tumultuous end of that decade ALL of that changed along with protests to the Vietnam war, a moratorium on exams and peace signs on our mortar boards. Ted Kennedy was our commencement speaker.
Here we are 40 years later with vegan dorms, wireless everywhere and majors in fields I’ve never heard of. What has stayed the same is our commitment to being “uncommon” women — Mary Lyon, our founder’s, special word for us.
I come back every 5 years to find out what my “uncommon” classmates are up to. It’s always something fascinating, engaging and of service to the world. I’m a proud alum and happy to be a part of the baby boom generation.
I won’t mention any names, as I don’t want to incriminate my wonderful and helpful counselor from SCORE. But, we were talking about the new edition of my book yesterday, and he said, “If you sell 600 copies you’ll be lucky.”
I was incredulous. I immediately responded, “I intend to sell 5000.”
He said, “If you sell 5000 copies, I’ll give you a million dollars.”
The interesting thing was what happened to my marketing spirit when he put out that challenge. It fully ignited. What could I do to sell 5000 copies? My mind went into full gear, high speed calculating and asking-for-help mode.
Then he amended this, by adding, “And my wife goes with the offer.” (This is why I won’t mention any names.)
My spirit sagged when he hedged his offer.
My job here is to stay connected with the energy he sparked with his first statement. I’m fully capable of selling 5000 books. I loved the extra motivation of his dare. I’m a real I’ll-show-you kinda gal. I realized I’d need help to accomplish this goal.
Please send along any tips you have for large order book sales. I’d love to sell (52 copy) cases at a time along with the onesies. I’ll show him!
(Some of you may remember when my husband bet me $1000 that he’d never watch the Oscars from beginning to end again. I put that hand-written wager in my tickler file and pulled it out just in time to collect the following year. I’m good at holding people to their word.)
The drive to the Danbury Federal Correction Institution and the facility itself were surprisingly attractive, if you could look past the sea of barbed wire and fencing all around. I was there last Friday and felt a little bit nervous upon arrival. We were screened as though getting on a flight and had our hands stamped in order to pass through an ultraviolet process and heavy-duty sealed passageway.
My daughter Laura joined me for the job fair at the prison. We set up along with about 10 other vendors including the Women’s Business Development Center (WBDC), an organization I’m very familiar with and whom I greatly admire. Lucy Baney of Access Technologies also had a table. She and I had met a few years ago when she spoke for WBDC. When she saw me rolling in my cartons of books she came right over and said, “Boy, they let anybody in here, don’t they?” Any nervousness I was feeling quickly dissipated with her warm and funny welcome.
I wasn’t sure who the prisoners were until someone pointed out that anyone wearing all khaki was an inmate. We had met a few women before the event who fit that description, but I thought they were staff. There was no discernible difference in appearance from those visiting and those residing there. The inmates ranged in age from twenty-something to sixty-ish and older. They were very open about how their incarceration would impact their ability to get jobs when released. Many were very interested in entrepreneurship and creating their own futures.
I gave a brief talk to each group that convened in my area. I wanted to convey hope and possibility no matter what the industry they were interested in. I brought my first book, Decorating Eggs, along to show them what I had made a successful business out of. They were all intrigued and could immediately understand the potential of their ideas, whether it was running a beauty salon or helping others with communication skills.
The women were eager to learn. I donated a copy of my newly republished book Soul Proprietor to each of them and was tickled that they lined up to get my autograph. This is the closest I come to feeling like a rock star.
My contact information is in the front of the book. I hope to hear from some of them as they develop their plans. It felt good to share a positive message with women who have served their time and deserve a second chance.
My daughter Laura and I leave for Danbury prison early this morning (it’s 5:49am as I write this). I’m unsure of what will happen at the job fair I’ve agreed to speak at, but anticipating a valuable learning opportunity. I’m going with an open mind, open heart and desire to share what I know.
In the meantime, I got a hearty response to my last blog about fees and pricing. Even as I was writing it, my mind kept flashing on my friend and colleague Kate Kelly. Sure enough, this message arrived soon after I posted. Take advantage!
From Kate:
How to Set Your Fees and Get Them, a book I wrote to address the difficulty of fee-setting, provides VERY helpful advice for anyone selling their services. Now that I’m writing more in the field of American history, I haven’t had time to re-publish the book so some of the anecdotes are a bit dated. That said, the book’s advice is still very solid, very relevant.
The book retailed for $17.50 but because I’m not actively promoting it, I would be more than happy to provide your readers with a “deal.” If they are willing to mail me $6 which will cover the envelope and first class postage, I will be honored to send them a copy of the book. Pls put Fees Book in the subject line and e-mail me: kkelly@katekelly.com. I’ll send them my mailing address and the book will go out as soon as I receive payment to cover my costs.
I don’t like to be misled. Like I was when I grabbed a mesh bag containing four avocados at Trader Joe’s Sunday morning. I saw the RIPE label on the skin and thought, “Great! I’ll use these tomorrow to make that salad I love.” When I got home and cut the avocados loose from the bag and gave them a squeeze, I knew they weren’t ready to be used yet. That’s when I noticed the small print saying “when soft”. I had been manipulated and misled by the large red print. I resented it.
Gaining our customers’ trust is important and anything that disrupts that process can create ill-will.
You are not alone if you have given an estimate or proposal for your goods or services, only to realize a few days or weeks into the project that you have underestimated your own time and value. Welcome to the club! This is part of the learning curve in entrepreneurship.
If there was one book that had the exact answer for how to price a job, it would be an all-time best-seller. The fact is, no one can say for sure what YOUR time is worth except you. And, you have to figure it out as you and your business grow over time.
A client recently shared with me that she had undervalued her creative services and asked how she might go about collecting the shortfall from her client. I recommended against this as a practice or even one-time happening. I am not in favor of passing along your learning to the person who is paying you. We, as business owners, are responsible for the cost of our own education. My friend Terri Lonier* calls it “tuition” and says “there’s no good way to ask for that money.”
Here’s the growth challenge. Rather than underbid a job, take the time to calculate your anticipated hours labor, materials and overhead. Be generous with yourself, as you know that things always take longer and that unexpected occurrences will pop up during any project. Account for those in your budget.
The risk here is stating your true anticipated cost upfront. The amount may be surprisingly high to you, but you’ve got it justified by your carefully considered mathematics. You may be pleasantly surprised by your prospect’s acceptance of your estimate.
If you believe in the saying, “Pay me now, or pay me later” you’ll appreciate the wisdom of asking upfront for what you really deserve rather than trying to make it up with explanations and pleading after the fact.
While I know that pricing can be a tricky issue, it’s better to gain clarity around your costs before, rather than after, the deal is made. Like most customers, unhappy surprises produce resentments.
*I had the privilege of being interviewed by Terri for her online newsletter. Here’s today’s issue.
I couldn’t think of a better way to spend a gorgeous Sunday than visiting my talented friends, colleagues and clients who were exhibiting their wares at one of the biggest trade shows in the world. This weekend featured the Stationery Show, Surtex (surface design) and ICFF–International Contemporary Furniture Fair all under the same roof.
I hopped on MetroNorth, arrived at Grand Central and took the 1.6 mile walk to the Jacob Javits Center across town. My mission was to see Malene Barnett’s exhibit at ICFF, which was stunning. Having just been featured in New York Magazine, Malene’s booth had a steady stream of clientele. I was fortunate to slip in for a brief congratulatory hug and high five.
You can see her carpet designs around us, as well as her cool logo and signage. Malene has traveled the world and interpreted it through her textile designs for the hospitality industry. She has truly reached the big time.
Anne Taintor and I go back to the days of exhibiting our wares at the Westport Creative Arts Festival, now CraftWestport back in the 80′s. Anne went global with her stationery items. Her tag line is “Making Smart People Laugh since 1985.” She reminded me that she is celebrating her 25th year in business. Her hilarious notepads, greeting cards and office supplies are my favorite gifts to give clients–all of whom are smart people.
At Surtex I saw Karen Embry who was participating in her 4th show at Javits. She and her work have matured so much since we began working together in 2002. Her style has developed from doing lots of things with whimsy and bright colors to establishing a branded look that says KAREN EMBRY. Kind of what I was talking about when I wrote about my 300th blog post. Karen really knows what she does well now, and it is clear to the buyer, which is the more important outcome of plying your trade consistently.
What I admire most about these three women is that they have put themselves out there and taken a huge risk. The cost of doing a show in NYC is sky-high. But the rewards can be equally heaven-sent. They exhibit not only talent, but also courage and perseverance. They’re at the top.
Two years ago when I made my first blog entry, my dear friend, mentor and book proposal coach Lucy Hedrick said, “This is really good, Jane. In about two years, you’re going to have quite an accumulation of material. Could even be your next book.” I love Lucy. What she said was entirely correct. But in the moment of elation that I’d finally begun a process I’d been hemming and hawing about for almost as long, the last thing I wanted to hear was that it would take two years to get the traction I was looking for.
Of course, she was right.
When I first started speaking professionally, the pros ALL said, you really don’t have your speech down until you’ve given it 50 times. Who wants to hear that? When you’re all enthusiastic about getting on the platform, having the applause and getting paid?
Again, they were right.
So the message is, enjoy the joy of getting started and being a newbie. Enjoy whatever the immediate rewards of the process bring. And know that the deepening of your talent and message are what reap the larger benefits.
I’m now celebrating my 300th blog post and my second anniversary of writing blogs 3x per week. I think I’ve got the hang of it now. I’m becoming comfortable with my voice. I see that my readership is increasing. None of that happens out of the gate no matter how much I want it to be so.
My advice to those of you considering starting a blog? Do it! I have learned more about myself, what I care about, who my market is and what’s important to me than I had in the 10 years prior. It’s an investment in time and resources, but the rewards are incalculable. I’ve gotten to know you better, and the impetus for republishing Soul Proprietor was entirely a result of being in touch with you through my blog.
Thanks for telling me the truth, Lucy, painful as it was at the time.
I was very sad yesterday to receive an email announcing the closing of Brookfield Craft Center. I feel as though I grew up there.
It was at Brookfield that I learned goal setting from master teacher Laurie Klein. I took multiple classes from quilter and genius colorist Michael James. I had my first one-woman show at Brookfield when they had their SoNo location and got into the NY Times for the first time. I taught many classes there and made many friends in the process. Most recently, I attended a textile show curated by Liz Alpert Fay.
The former Executive Director, Jack Russell, left a year or so ago which was also sad. Jack had guided that institution with a vision and a firm hand. Whenever you guest taught at Brookfield, dinner with Jack and his wife Judith was a highlight. Not only did you get to spend quality time with this knowledgable and exhilarating couple, but you also got to hobnob with other elite artists. Even though I lived only 40 minutes away, I always made sure I stayed for dinner.
The recession has altered the landscape of all of our lives in many ways. This loss feels especially heartbreaking for me and the community it produced.
After a super-busy weekend in NYC and out of my office for nearly three days, things have a way of piling up exponentially. It feels burdensome to walk into my office and see every countertop filled with business cards, unsorted mail and yellow stickies with important to-do’s jotted down on them.
The first thing I did this morning was a gross sort. As you can see from this photo, I have a lot of areas in my life. I just assigned each of them a pile and labeled them so I can spend quality time on book promotion, my new Mastermind groups, speaking and family matters.
By doing this, I opened up space on the other side of the office for actually generating the effort:
Lesson 48 in the new edition of Soul Proprietor is all about getting organized. “What really, really gets me inspired is a clean desk.” (p. 94)
It happened for me this morning. As soon as all the piles were sorted out and that space next to my computer was cleared out, I could feel my creative juices begin to flow and my energy rise. Try it. You’ll like it.
BTW, I set a timer and give myself 15 minutes for the sorting. It’s motivating to know I don’t have to spend an hour doing this, just 15 minutes. Don’t you know, after the buzzer goes off, I’m so into the process I set it for another 15 so I can keep going.
I’m not a big fan club person, but Oprah holds a particular fascination for me–the empire she’s created, the people she has around her and the message she expounds. So, I plunked down $377 to attend the Live Your Best Life weekend in New York City in anticipation of seeing up-close-and-personal the likes of Oprah, Gayle, Dr. Oz, Martha Beck, etc.
I was not disappointed.
Here is Oprah herself kicking off the event Saturday morning at Jacob Javits Convention Center. There were thousands of women and a sprinkling of men in attendance. At this morning opener, Oprah introduced Elizabeth Gilbert of Eat, Pray, Love fame to set the tone for the day, which she did. My favorite story of Elizabeth’s was about how we are each running life in our own mazes. We peek over the walls of ours to look at each others’ mazes to get clues for our own journey. That, she said, explains the popularity of memoirs (like hers) and also of the Oprah show. We’re all looking for how to do it better or differently. She was wonderful.
The big event was Saturday night at Radio City Music Hall where Oprah captivated us thousands assembled with a monologue of her history, illustrated on a large screen behind her as she spoke. She’s extraordinary. The firsts she’s accomplished, the hurdles she leapt, the people she’s met–totally incredible, enviable and fabulous. (BTW, before the program began it was announced that our presence in the Music Hall gave her production company the usage of our images, voices, etc. throughout the universe in perpetuity. And I feel like I’m intruding when I ask someone to sign a contract for a 6-month coaching commitment!)
My purpose in going this past weekend was mostly to observe the masters at work, which I did. These people are at the top of the field nationally and internationally. I learn so much from watching–the professionalism, stature and grace it takes to stand and speak in front of thousands, how large a village it takes to pull off an event like this, how much discomfort they are willing to put an audience through (i.e. waiting 1 hour and 15 minutes in the cold for the walk to begin) and what sponsors are willing to do if you can reach such a vast market.
I’m also very grateful to be back in my comfortable environment, familiar schedule and among the people I’ve chosen to be in my world.
