I recently started working with a wonderful woman who came to me for life coaching, not business coaching. She is figuring out what’s next for her, and it clearly isn’t what she’s been doing for the last several years–putting everyone else’s needs first. I recommended that she begin to say “no” to those activities that drain her, like attending parties for little ones she’s not actually related to.

We also came up with exciting tasks for her to pursue as she’s rejecting the life-draining ones. She is to interview a couple of identified people in industries that make her juices flow. Saying “no” will be new behavior as will stepping out of her current comfort zone. But her delighted giggle told me she would accept the challenge.

While she may not be clear yet on what she’s moving toward, experience shows that taking a stand in support of oneself hastens the flow of what’s next. Now that doesn’t sound very scientific, so I was tickled when later in that same day I heard ‘big girl’ words stating that exact hypothesis.

I attended an excellent webinar given by a colleague in the webinar training course I’ve been taking all summer. The subject was leadership and the thesis was that leadership is fueled by energy–positive or negative. The session’s instructor  elaborated by describing catabolic energy–the breakdown of molecules–and its de-motivating destructive impact and anabolic energy–the synthesizing of molecules–and its creative, expanding and life-giving force.

“Our thoughts create our energy,” she stated. “When you get rid of the catabolic forces, your purpose and direction will show up. It presents itself.”

Precisely the message I’d given my client in the morning, but with more syllables. In coaching, we call that a wink from the Universe. (I wonder what  corporates call it.)