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Lynn Robinson at the Enterprising Women conference in Hyannis, MA
The Enterprising Women conference I spoke at on Wednesday was inspiring from the get-go. Lynn Robinson, pictured here, was the opening keynote speaker. She addressed the topic of using intuition in business in a way that underscored every belief I’ve ever had and put an exclamation point on it.
Lynn’s talk, Trusting Your Gut–How the Power of Intuition Can Grow Your Business, took the audience through the paces of opening up to and trusting what she calls your ‘inner consultant’–your intuition. The steps Lynn talked about, with memorable stories to illustrate each point (buy her book!) include:
- Setting intentions
- Focusing on the WHAT, not the HOW
- Catching negative thoughts
- Practicing positive self-talk
- Asking your intuition
The most important thing I heard Lynn say was this: that just because we are intuitive and are guided by signs from within, that doesn’t mean that we automatically move from success to success. There may be long periods of drought, indecision, difficulty and disappointment in the process. But ultimately, if you are being guided by your inner knowing, your intuition will not fail you.
I had the good fortune to have dinner with Lynn the night before the event. We’re good pals from our NSA-New England Chapter days, and this was a perfect opportunity to re-connect and catch up. I got a preview of some of her stories and want to share one that was the most incredible and delicious. You’ll see what I mean.
Lynn had been chewing on a particularly difficult challenge in her business and was at her wits’ end. (You can read a more in-depth version here.) Although not a Christian, the phrase kept coming to her, “I want to see the hand of God. I want to see the hand of God on my life.” Over and over, those same words. She was sobbing, wracked with pain over this turning point in her career and didn’t know where to look next. She was looking for reassurance from on high to stay the course.
Her loving husband valiantly stepped in to comfort her. He knew that ice cream often did the trick and offered to take her for a sundae. Lynn kept crying and repeating her desire to see the hand of God on her life, even as they drove to the ice cream parlor. “I just want to see God’s hand on my life.”
She ordered her sundae, wiped away her tears when it arrived, and noticed her sign. There it was, quite creatively writ on a scoop of vanilla ice cream. She continued on the course she was on and never looked back. How sweet is that?
I love watching a conversion.
In the first module of my webinar series I talk about creating a vision for your business/life. I offer two methods for doing that–a vision board or a written statement. This week I had the opportunity to review visions with one of my webinar participants, Sandy Lovell.
Sandy has been very successful in her career and was in a transitional phase when she signed on for my class. I could tell from our conversations that she was holding herself back, not dreaming big enough. During this week’s Q+A session, she admitted to having begun, but not completed, the vision board assignment. I counter-offered, and Sandy said she was willing to write a vision statement instead which included outrageous, stretch goals and desires.
As we talked on the phone, I suggested a weekly massage as part of her self-care regimen in her vision. She simply laughed at the preposterousness of the idea. Although it felt too indulgent, she promised to add it to her written vision.
Sandy joined in again on the next Q+A call and immediately opened the conversation with, “You won’t believe this! I did what you said. Wrote the vision statement, and in today’s email, I received a groupon deal for a massage. I signed up. How did that happen?!”
It’s The Secret in action, the law of attraction. That you bring into your life what you think about. Writing it down and cutting and pasting pictures of your desires hastens the process and directs the universe–and your attention–towards your particular longings.
Tomorrow I leave for an envisioned vacation. I’m traveling to the Caribbean for a cruise – Holistic Holiday at Sea. Years ago my table mate at EWN told me that every six weeks she takes a week off. I made a mental note of that ambitious and luxurious goal and am beginning my own manifestation of it. I was a guest presenter at a spa in Mexico in December, now vacationing in the tropics in March. Not quite six weeks, but wonderfully in the right direction.
I’ll be out to sea for a week. No phone. No email. Nothing but the ocean, nature and R+R. I highly recommend your following my lead as often as possible.
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I had the honor of opening the 2012 season for the National Kitchen and Bath Association’s meeting this week with my talk on Creating Your Own Future. It’s a goal-setting session with lots of interactivity. After asking participants to dream big, I had them break down their dream into a manageable next step. Then I asked for volunteers to share what they’d written.
Debbie Blumencranz of Kitchens By Deane raised her hand to share her deep desire to pass the NCIDQ exam which would change her status to ASID - American Society of Interior Designers. She’s currently an Allied member and wants that elite distinction on her business card.
I asked if anyone in the audience had achieved that hard-won designation. Two rows in front of Debbie a hand went up. Terry Scarborough turned her chair around, faced Debbie and offered to give her some tips on taking the exam.
At the same moment, the two of them burst out laughing. I asked what was so funny. “Terry sits next to me at the office. I never knew she had that designation.”
Terry said, “I had no idea Debbie was studying for the exam.”
It was a precious moment, and the rest of the crowd had their mouths hanging open (figuratively). In my experience leading goal-setting workshops, this happens all the time. We think that our hopes and dreams are totally unique and that not one other soul could possibly comprehend how precious this thing is to us. Then, when we put it out there, the Universe provides willing helpers to guide our way.
Here’s a challenge for you this January: Share a goal or longing with someone you know and trust and notice what happens. Please share the results with me.
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On my drive from Tucson, where the retreat was held en route to the airport in Phoenix, I saw a spectacular rainbow–in Arizona! Over the desert. Not what you’d expect. That pretty much sums up my fabulous experience at Miraval with 100+ MORE readers plus the magazine’s editorial staff and publisher. To say it exceeded my expectations would be an understatement.
The facility is magnificent–a resort built at the base of the Santa Catalina Mountains–with lavish accommodations and multiple athletic, spa and spiritual offerings to please any patron. But the true value of my experience began during the Meet the Editors welcome the first evening there. I sat in the front row and was immediately extended a warm welcome by the woman seated to my right, Natalie Caine. 
Within two minutes it was clear that I was in the right place. I’m going to speak at Rancho La Puerta next month, and Natalie had just returned from her own speaking engagement there. Now, really. What are the chances of that serendipitous alignment of stars?! We became fast friends and had breakfast together daily.
The highlight of Day 2 was participating in the Equine Experience where I was well instructed on how to groom a horse including getting him to lift his hooves for me to clean. After that I was taught how to have my horse go from a walk to a trot and change directions in the ring simply by directing my energy core towards his and setting my intention. I’ve got the pictures to prove that I was able to accomplish this amazing feat. Amazing to me, anyway.
Throughout these experiences and meals I kept meeting remarkable women from all over the US. Conversations were spontaneous and quickly intimate, which I loved.
When I got back to the ‘main campus’ after the horse experience, one of the women I’d met in that group spotted a jeweler, Marybeth Johnson, she’d previously encountered who was exhibiting her work in the Miraval shop.
I was immediately drawn not only to the beauty and spirituality of this woman’s pieces, but also to her gentle and loving energy. We had a couple of wonderful conversations, as I had already walked the path she was currently on and could lend some thoughts and advice for her journey. She was a receptive audience, and we became fast friends.
My original intention for going to this long weekend event was to meet Barbara Bigford whom I’d written about after she’d been featured in MORE. Her story is truly inspirational, and what I admired most about Barbara, who shared her story at lunch on Friday–”From Idea to Barcode”– is her willingness to go to any lengths for her business in a low-key, tenacious and graceful way. She shared her wild success, but also her steep learning curve and mistakes made along the way. Employed as a dental hygienist before becoming a business mogul, you can imagine how inspiring her story was.
The day after her talk, Barbara and I met up for a morning walk and talk about retirement co-sponsored by MORE and Wells Fargo. We hiked the grounds of the resort, then assembled by a bonfire 
to hear about financial planning and share our concerns with the Deputy Editor of MORE whose focus is personal finance and work–Jennifer Braunschweiger.
I could go on… It was filling, inspiring, nurturing, fun and important. Join me next year!
Never have truer words been spoken! On Friday, July 8 at 4:09pm, my daughter Lindsey gave birth to Chloe Elizabeth, her and Evan’s first child, my first grandchild.
All other accomplishments fall by the wayside. Birth is a miracle, and being a witness (metaphorically, not in the delivery room) to this wondrous process is a gift beyond imagination.
This child comes from an increasingly long line of women business owners. My mother created Fete Accompli, a party-planning business back in the 60′s. Grandma Jane (I told Lindsey and Evan that I wanted to be called Lady Gaga, but evidently, that’s already been taken) has been entrepreneurial since 1980 (1970 if you count when I sold my first pieces of artwork for dollars from strangers) and Lindsey who is the owner of lindseypollak.com.
I’m sure other family members look to this somewhat blank canvas and project their hopes and dreams there as well. What I do know is that she will become who she is and have her own journey to get there. She could not have asked for two more loving parents to guide her way.
I ask your blessings and good wishes for this precious gift.
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If you haven’t bought Tina Fey’s new #1 bestselling book yet, don’t wait! As soon as I read the NYTimes review a couple of weeks ago I placed my order (I know, very old-fashioned) and waited for the Wells Fargo wagon to deliver it. I was not disappointed. I read most of it on my train ride to and from DC this weekend. I didn’t laugh out loud, but I was grinning the whole time. She’s a powerful role model.
I adored everything about Bossypants, but the two biggest takeaways for me were the luck factor and the self-doubt piece. Every woman entrepreneur should read this book. Even though Tina Fey isn’t self-employed, what she describes, and the brilliance with which she articulates her stories, cuts right to the heart of anyone who puts herself on the line each day.
As someone who would like to attain more of a share of public attention, I look at Tina Fey as a huge success with a swift journey. In reading her book, it became crystal clear that this woman has paid her dues. This was a great reminder of how long it takes and how the stars need to line up to help you. Although I’d heard about her through Mean Girls, Saturday Night Live and 30 Rock, it wasn’t until her Sarah Palin impersonations that she became a household name.
Now think about that. Can you control who’s going to run for Vice President of the United States AND bear a resemblance to you? Are you creative enough to make something like this up? I believe that there’s a greater force out there and our job is, as Tina Fey states, is to do the work we love. She loves her work and admits that she has her dream job. That’s the deal. You need to be following your bliss, your passion. Even though it might take a minor miracle, like resembling Sarah Palin, you’re still traveling the road that has your name on it.
The other piece, and I so totally love her honesty, is Tina Fey’s “ability to turn good news into anxiety [which] is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.”
Although I wrote recently about not comparing ourselves to others, it gave me heart to know that this icon is as insecure as I am.
If you’re not convinced yet, take it from one of the testimonials on the back cover:
“Totally worth it.” –Trees
P.S. Today’s fantasy: That Tina Fey will read this blog post and want to become my BFF.
One of my clients is in that long, dark hallway that seems to lengthen and dim as a huge deadline draws near. She has been relentlessly working toward her vision. Opening day is soon. Her gremlins have formed choruses and are serenading her hourly.
“She” is actually a collage of several of my clients who are about to manifest big time, but are on the precipice of belief today. Is it really possible to have this dream? The answer is YES. It just doesn’t feel that way.
One of the tools I give the amazing women I work with is called metavision–taking a helicopter view of what their lives look like rather than the magnifying lens perspective.
All of my clients excel at the microscopic details of getting the job done. They’re exceptional at their crafts, remarkable in their abilities to attract and utilize the skills of others to assist them, and uncommon at accepting responsibility and responding to the needs and wants of others. They’re visionaries when it comes to how their talents can make this world a better place.
Where I need to guide each of these wonderful women is in pulling back from the day-to-day operations and having them look at the big picture. What does your life look like from 5000 feet up? Who’s in the picture with you? Do you like what you’re doing? Are you having fun? What’s the scenery surrounding you? Is this where you want to be?
Often, they are so caught up in the dailiness of production that how they’re living their lives is overlooked. When, on our call, we shoot up and look at what’s happening below, there’s an energy shift, a recognition that this is what they’re meant to be doing. It’s not easy, but it could not be any other way.
All of my clients love what they do. (It’s a prerequisite of working with me.) Where they need my help is believing that the miracle is coming, especially in today’s uncertain economic climate where everything has a longer lead time than in the past. Whether and when it will arrive is not guaranteed, but the daily journey is where we can take responsibility. Your attitude and outlook inform your mental and physical health and your fortune.
The adage tells us it is always darkest before the dawn. Will you stay the course of the long dark night of the soul?
While I did skip a few classes at InfusionCon, I made sure to be in a front row seat for Brian Tracy‘s afternoon keynote on Wednesday. He’s a hero of mine. I listened to his audio programs (on tape!) repeatedly when I was sitting in my art studio for hours on end decorating eggs. How to Master Your Time and the Psychology of Achievement taught me skills and disciplines that I have continued to practice for 20 years.
Here are some new ideas I picked up or was reminded of:
- The two biggest problems for business owners are sales and balance.
- If you come up with an idea that works, your competition will steal it. [It's not personal; just the nature of business.]
- ALL business skills are learnable. (I have to remember that one around my twitter resistance.)
- The #1 issue for small businesses is cash flow.
- Fewer than 5% of businesses make the $1 million mark.
- The difference between marketing and selling: Marketing is getting people to raise their hand; selling is converting them to buy yours (taking the money out of their pockets and handing it to you).
- The most important word in business is ASK! For the sale, but also about what you don’t understand or need help with.
- The English translation for “Let me think it over”–when selling, is “Goodbye forever.”
- It’s important to know the demographic of your customer, but it’s more important to know the psychographic–what are their thoughts, feelings, fears, aspirations, etc.
- When you identify your prospect’s primary fear and remove it AND deliver what you promise, the sale is yours (e.g. money-back guarantee)
Having seen and heard this business icon, I returned home content.
Leigh Scott attended my Create Your Own Future retreat three year ago this month. During that event, we had a Come As You’ll Be activity projecting forward five years from the present. That night Leigh presented herself as the successful author of a book on parenting. She’s right on schedule.
This morning Leigh showed me a copy of her proposal–the document an author prepares for a literary agent who then sells it to a publisher. I got goosebumps when I saw what Leigh had put together. It was a spiral bound book with dividers for each of the areas required in a proposal including:
- About the book
- About the author
- Marketing
- Table of Contents
- Sample Chapter
- The Competition
And more. It took Leigh nearly a year of dedicated work to prepare this draft. She made the book her priority during this time. She made other changes as well. Knowing how much time she wanted to devote to writing, Leigh looked at her whole life and chose to make changes. She downsized her living situation to reduce her cost of living, which in turn reduced how much money she needed to earn.
These were all well-considered decisions with the vision of the book serving as the achievement that would make this worthwhile. She knew that in order to accomplish this life goal, certain activities would fall by the wayside. Making writing her priority, Leigh intentionally went without watching TV for a year. She chose to make time only for what was most important–earning enough to live while writing this book. Leigh was sure to include and pay for an accountability structure to keep her on track with her writing during the process.
In describing her feeling of satisfaction and delayed gratification, Leigh told an analogous story, perfectly related to her subject matter: parenting. A young boy had poured water on his father’s laptop computer. The father, modeling the behavior of a loving authority, explained to the child that his toy tractor was going to be taken away until the little boy carried out enough chores (suited to his level of ability–like licking envelopes and putting away toys) to make up for his dad’s loss. After four months of enforcing this ‘punishment’ the debt was repaid. The father took out the toy tractor which the little boy thought was brand new. “This is even better than the one I used to have!” he proclaimed. “It goes faster and I like it better.”
When you process something step-by-step (no shortcuts), suffer the slings and arrows of the journey, the ultimate reward is sweeter. Even if you weren’t in Westport, CT this morning, you may have felt the joy radiating out from Leigh’s pleasure in accomplishment.
Watch for Leigh’s book Becoming a Loving Authority: How to Get Out of Your Own Way as a Parent. I’ll see you at the book party!
Just back from meeting someone new for coffee and recognized a theme in our conversation. This wonderful woman entrepreneur had a great idea. She had found a location to house her concept that absolutely lit her up. The cost of it was discouraging, but we talked about her making the owner an offer just to re-open the conversation. There was great hesitation on my new friend’s part.
I related two stories to her.
A couple of years ago a client of mine who is a photographer was looking for a studio outside her home so she wouldn’t have to schlep equipment every time someone wanted a headshot. If she had a studio space in a good location, people would come there. Plus, if it were in a commercial retail space, there’d be foot traffic and walk-in’s as well. “But I can’t afford any space in Fairfield County, ” she insisted. Long story short, I challenged her to at least speak to a realtor. Which resulted in her finding a space that fit her needs exactly, that when shared with a colleague of hers cost her $500 a month for 2000 square feet of space–exactly what she had envisioned.
Story #2 – I was in the original company of the Mount Holyoke College Summer Theatre and continued to attend shows there for many years. At the beginning of every performance, the director would come out and make a few announcements, one of which went something like this: “Westover Air Force base is located only a few miles from here. They fly their drill patterns at night, so when that occurs, the actors will pause where they are in the performance, freeze, then resume the play as soon as the flight has passed over.” Summer after summer this was the way it was. Until someone said to her, “Have you ever called Westover to see if they might accommodate your show schedule?” The answer was no, she had not. She assumed it was an impossibility, a ridiculous question for a college theatre to make a request of the AIR FORCE.
She made the call. And you know what happened? They changed the flight patterns. No more interrupted summer stock performances, because someone had the courage to ask.
How about you? Have you even asked the question? What inspiration is burning in you that you THINK is impossible and haven’t even allowed yourself to inquire about? I challenge you to take that risk and share your results with me and my readers.
